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Before the invention of the PlayStation, human beings would amuse themselves by hurling sharpened rocks at each other, building and then destroying large wicker men and Atari. It really wasn’t very good.
But then, in the mid-1990′s, a gaming event so monumental occurred that Richard Marx considered writing a song about it. Yes, it was the release of the PlayStation 1. Or, as it was known at the time, the PlayStation. Soon the whole wide world was playing along with games such as ‘Fast Car Driving Danger’, ‘Space Guns’ and ‘Chungking Express: The Game‘.
And we have never looked back. Well, we all have to look back occasionally, especially when driving. Please, please don’t take that last sentence as a directive to never look back and then sue us when you are rear-ended. What I mean is, we never looked back in a game playing console sort of way.
Each evolution of the PlayStation outmaneuvered the previous iteration in both looking nice and sounding great. As this mighty Infographic utterly describing the movements of the PlayStation genre displays, it has ventured from glorious god-like inception to its phoenix like rise from the ashes of PlayStation 3 to be revealed as PlayStation 4, the latest edition of the console which had the writers of ‘How Console?’ magazine proclaiming ‘It’s simply my reason to live and now my new wife’.
And if you wish to share the rise of the PlayStation with your little pals, just swipe the code that lies beneath it and paste it wherever the feeling takes you. We will not judge, we never judge.
Just imagine how fun it would be to start your very own sovereign nation.
You can design your own flag, possibly with a parakeet or the face of Professor Brian Cox (or both) on it. Perhaps have a Hi-NRG dance track as your national anthem (which could be composed by former D:Ream member Professor Brian Cox). And then have Professor Brian Cox on all your currency, with ten Cox’s to the Cox.
Creating your own country might strike you as a baffling ordeal with lots of forms to fill out and armies to assemble, but as our Infographic helpfully sets out, it can be achieved in just a few simple steps. Yes you may need your own island or a large boat, and you don’t want to be too close to Tonga, but otherwise it’s a doddle.
If you do follow our instructions and start your own nation, we’d love to hear about it. Just drop us a line, if you’ve had the stamps with Professor Brian Cox’s face printed up yet. And if you’d like to spread the word about all this, then just steal the code from beneath the Infographic and copy and paste it wherever you wish.
God bless your new nation (Brianania) and all who sail in her!
Remember your favourite Sci-Fi spectaculars such as ‘The Zygon Paradox’, ‘Commander Bucko and his Space Chums’ and ‘Galaxy Gambol’?
If you are anything like me, your favourite part of these remarkable intergalactic epics are the crazy futuristic devices and gadgets that the principal characters utilise. Things for your health, items for transportation and large virtual reality zones where you can pretend to be Sherlock Holmes or Lovejoy.
But you may be gob-smacked to learn that many of these items currently exist within our planet: Earth. Below you will find a whole legion of these magical objects, displayed in Infographic form. Their history, influence and dimensions will be utterly explained to you.
And what is more we’d be happy for you to swipe this wondrous pictorial for your own World Wide Web ‘inter-page’ and place it wherever you wish, just by copying the code you can see below. And don’t worry, a gaggle of Thought Police in visors and white uniforms won’t break down the door of your pod for doing so.
Is someone is currently screaming into your face, “CARS CARS CARS, all you talk about is CARS” before bursting into tears and rushing from the room, as you turn over from Top Gear on Dave to watch Top Gear on BBC Three, while idly watching cars drive by through the window?
If this is you, you might be a Petrolhead, that peculiar condition where anything automotive causes your eyes to glaze over, your breath to shorten and your voicebox to release involuntary ‘erg’ sounds. You simply love motors. Their cute little bonnets, there delightful floor mats and their infeasibly attractive roof racks. Every aspect of the internal combustion engine causes you to swoon and gurgle like a young lady at a David Essex pop concert.
But if you are still to be convinced about your Petrolhead standing, have a squint at this rather nifty Infographic, which lays out all the potential symptoms of Petrolhead-ism, a bit like those terrifying information posters you get at the doctors office about gout that leave you feeling a little clammy. Use the code below to swipe this beauty and add it to your when location and share the facts with potential fellow sufferers.
And we’ve even created a US version that you can see RIGHT HERE for all you Yankee Doodles with your Chevvys and drive-through hamburger sandwich establishments. And as you Petrolheads always say, “Happy Car Driving!”
Everyone knows that bigger is better. Everyone. Except possibly those unfortunate people that can only leave their homes by having an exterior wall removed.
I mean think about it, who is the greatest footballer to have ever lived? That’s right, it’s also the biggest footballer: Peter Crouch. And you may have noticed that when we had nice chunky mobile phones, back in the 1980′s, everything was hunky dory. Now we have those tiny, titchy handsets and the economy is completely in the toilet. There must be a connection.
In honour of all things gigantic, we have this massively entertaining infographic showcasing various large things and the vast joy that they bring people. And we want to share this joy, so swipe the code below and paste it into every web page you see with a gap. We feel that will be both big and clever.
We love driving them, we love eating in them, we love fly-tipping out of them. Seriously, I would marry my car if I could. Marry her. I would, absolutely. Don’t push me, because I will. I’ll go out this afternoon and marry my Mondeo. Bella. And have the reception at Halfords.
And just like several of the other people, and inanimate objects, that I have previously married, our cars are continually trying to kill us. As the delightful Informational-Graphical (Or Infographic) below illustrates, there are a variety of ways in which your vehicle can suddenly become deadly – from fumes to Sat-Navs to appalling posture. And when they come to life due to some ancient Nordic curse.
We want to spread the word about all this auto-mayhem, so please feel free to swipe the graphic for your own internet information page, bulletin board or virtual hob-nobbery using the code displayed below. And don’t drive angry. Or badly.
So far the future has been bitterly disappointing.
No legions of servile, brainwashed citizens wearing white jumpsuits in some sort of desert setting, all bending under the tyranny of a mysterious despotic leader who appears on over-sized video screens and is probably played by Christopher Plummer. I mean, what’s up with that?
Instead we have Coke Zero and a popular television show that is actually set within a High Street chicken shop. Thanks a lot, future. So let’s hope when this particular epoch crumbles into oblivion, there will be a load of exciting stuff barrelling down the pike.
As this delightful Infographic illustrates, the future is going to have some boss aspects, including bionic bits, trains and things that we stick in our brains. All of which our insect overlords are sure to be onboard with. And in the spirit of anarchy, you can simply take and display this Infographic elsewhere, by pinching the code below.
Ok, get ready, because the segue I’m about to lay on you is going to BLISTERING. Ready? Ready for this segue? Right, here it comes: And if you want to enjoy a taste of future today, why not try out Water Jetpack thing we do RIGHT HERE.
You’ve torn up some city streets in your M1A2 Abrams in COD: Ghosts.
You’ve probably driven through a barn and emerged covered in hay and chickens while trying to conquer The Dukes of Hazzard: Racing For Home for the PS1. I sincerely hope so. There is an amazing hidden screen where Daisy and Boss Hogg… actually never mind, we’re getting off track.
So why am I shouting at you about video games and vehicles and startlingly short hot pants? Because we love you and because we want to send some dedicated gamers out there to get a taste of metal, petrol and guns (paintball) in the real world.
All you have to do, using the exciting competition mechanics you see below, is tell us which of the following you would like to do the most. We will randomly select one entry at random once the competition has expired and then that person will be sent off on the vehicular adventure of their dreams (i.e. the one they picked, they can’t spend the night with KITT from Knight Rider or anything).
So what’s on offer? Which of these is the most boat floating:
AUDI R8 EXPERIENCE: Six miles on a closed circuit in a supercar so awesome the Pope himself was heard to declare ‘Mama Mia that’s a spicy meatball!’ – MORE ON IT HERE
RALLY CAR DRIVING EXPERIENCE: Who amongst us hasn’t had a recurring dream where we are driving off-road while wearing a crash helmet while a man next to us holds a clipboard and shouts ‘GO, GO, GO!’ Turn that dream in to gravel snaffling, Evo driving reality. – FIND OUT MORE
SKID CONTROL EXPERIENCE: Emulate your favourite stunt drivers like The Fall Guy, Hooper and…erm…George Michael? Trained stunty pros while show you how to skid, spin and aquaplane in style. – DETAILS OVER HERE
SINGLE SEATER THRILL: This is as close as you are going to get to a Formula 1 experience, unless you decide to get very friendly with Bernie Ecclestone. I mean VERY friendly. Take this unbelievable machine as fast as you dare around the track. HERE ARE THE FACTS
Which one will it be? All you have to do is select the one you think is most desirable and, after we pick the winner on December 5th, it could be you whizzing and skidding and tanking all over the shop. Good luck!
Turkey Twizzlers. Eggnog flavoured Malibu. Standing outside an all-night garage at 11.59pm on December 24th and pleading with the man inside to sell you that Neil Sedaka compilation CD from behind the counter that he actually brought from home. Christmas has many wonderful traditions.
But as you may be aware, one Christmas tradition is about to be mercilessly ripped from before our eyes in a way that is neither festive or particularly jolly.
For the first time since the Nativity, the film that typifies Christmas more than any other, Elf, will no longer be shown on terrestrial screens but has been snatched, Grinch style, by Sky, so it can now only be viewed by satellite dish owning Millionaires and those on remand.
We’ve taken legal advice, but incredibly it seems there’s no law against it. Not even a European one. But then we remembered that in our Wiltshire bunker constructed for any occurrences connected to the Rapture, Ragnarok or a Zombie Uprising, we do have an ‘Emergency Crimbo Contingency Pack’ nestled in the lower quarters. This consists of some powdered turkey, a bauble,a collapsible Yule Log and 50 copies of Elf on DVD.
In the spirit of giving and cross-promotion that this season imbues, we wish to give away all of our Elfs (or Elves) to needy people like yourselves, so Christmas can be complete again and Will Ferrell’s ‘He’s much too big to be an elf’ brand of shenanigans can be enjoyed by young, old and drunk alike.
To win a copy of Elf on DVD, all you have to do is head to Twitter (@wishcouk) and tweet using the hashtag #IWishUponAnElf to @Wishcouk and Wish will choose 50 lucky winners on Friday. Only those following Wish on Twitter will be considered (so that we can DM you). If you are one of the lucky winners you will be DM’d on Twitter with a link to claim your prize.
- Winners announced on Friday 22nd November 2013 (full terms below)
Help curtail this travesty of Santa-sized proportions. Enter now and GOOD LUCK!
Terms & Conditions
1. Promotion Description: The ‘Elf DVD Giveaway’ (“Sweepstakes”) begins on 11/20/2013 at 16:00 GMT and ends on 11/22/2013 at 13:00 (GMT (the “Promotion Period”). By participating in the Sweepstakes, each entrant unconditionally accepts and agrees to comply with and abide by these Official Rules and the decisions of Wishcouk Ltd (“Sponsor”), which shall be final and binding in all respects. Sponsor is responsible for the collection, submission or processing of Entries and the overall administration of the giveaway. Entrants should look solely to Sponsor with any questions, comments or problems related to the Sweepstakes.
2. Eligibility: Open to legal residents of UK only who are 18 years+ or older. Void where prohibited or restricted by law. Sponsor and their respective parents, subsidiaries, affiliates, distributors, retailers, sales representatives, advertising and promotion agencies and each of their respective officers, directors and employees (collectively, the “Promotion Entities”), and members of their immediate families and/or persons living in the same household as such persons, are ineligible to enter the Sweepstakes or win a prize.
3. Winner Selection: The winner of the Sweepstakes will be selected in a random drawing from among all eligible Entries received throughout the Promotion Period. The random drawing will be conducted by 48 hours by Sponsor or its designated representatives, whose decisions are final. Odds of winning will vary depending on the number of eligible Entries received. Winner will be notified by email at the email address provided in the Entry Information on or about 48 hours after the random drawing. Potential winner must accept a prize by email as directed by Sponsor within 48 hours of notification. Any winner notification not responded to or returned as undeliverable may result in prize forfeiture. The potential prize winner may be required to sign and return an affidavit of eligibility and release of liability, and a Publicity Release (collectively “the Prize Claim Documents”). No substitution or transfer of a prize is permitted except by Sponsor.
- 1 (#) winner(s) will receive [ 1 copy of Elf DVD ] (approximate retail value or “ARV”: £3)
Only one prize per person and per household will be awarded. Prizes cannot be transferred, redeemed for cash or substituted by winner. Sponsor reserves the right in its sole and absolute discretion to award a substitute prize of equal or greater value if a prize described in these Official Rules is unavailable or cannot be awarded, in whole or in part, for any reason. Sponsor will not replace any lost or stolen prize items.
Prize will only be awarded and/or delivered to addresses within UK only
6. Limitation of Liability: Sponsor is not responsible for any incorrect or inaccurate information, whether caused by website users or by any of the equipment or programming associated with or utilized in the Sweepstakes or by any technical or human error, which may occur in the processing of submissions in the Sweepstakes. Sponsor assumes no responsibility for any misdirected or lost mail, or any error, omission, interruption, deletion, defect, delay of operation or transmission, communications line failure, theft or destruction or unauthorized access to, or alteration of, Entries. Sponsor is not responsible for any problems or technical malfunction of any telephone network or lines, computer online systems, servers or providers, computer equipment, software, failure of email or players on account of technical problems or traffic congestion on the Internet or at any website or combination thereof, including injury or damage to entrant’s or any other person’s computer related to or resulting from participating downloading materials in the Sweepstakes. If, for any reason, the Sweepstakes is not capable of running as planned, including infection by computer virus bugs, tampering, unauthorized intervention, fraud, technical failures, or any other causes beyond the control of Sponsor which corrupt or affect the administration, security, fairness, integrity or proper conduct of the Sweepstakes, then Sponsor reserves the right in its sole discretion to cancel, terminate, modify or suspend the Sweepstakes. In such event, Sponsor may, in its sole discretion, perform the random drawing from among all eligible Entries received prior to or after such cancellation, suspension, or modification.
In the event of a dispute concerning who registered online to participate in the Sweepstakes, the registration will be declared to have been made by the authorized account holder is defined as the natural person who is assigned to an email address by an internet provider, online service provider, or other organization (e.g., business, education institution, etc.) that is responsible for assigning email addresses for the domain associated with the submitted email address. A potential winner may be requested to provide Sponsor with proof that the potential winner is the authorized account holder of the email address. If a dispute cannot be resolved to Sponsor’s satisfaction, the entry will be deemed ineligible.
7. Winner’s List: To obtain a copy of any legally required winners list or a copy of the Official Rules, send the applicable request and a self-addresses, stamped, #10 envelope to Wishcouk Ltd cc: Elf DVD Giveaway at 27 Mortimer Street London, United Kingdom. W1T 3BL. Request must be received no later than 48 hours + 6 MONTHS for the name of the winner and, by the end of the promotion, for a copy of the rules.
8. Sponsor: The Sweepstakes is sponsored by Wishcouk Ltd, 27 Mortimer Street London, United Kingdom. W1T 3BL, wish.co.uk/contact
Are you a fan of winning free things, intrigue and tiny little men in colourful costumes?
Yes, of course you are! Then do we have a fabulous free giveaway, prize-abundant competition type thrill-vent (a new word I just invented to signify a thrilling event – please don’t steal it, I have trademarked it and I am very litigious. Oh? Don’t believe me? Just try it, go on, I dare you?).
We have ten stupendous copies of the new racing thriller After the Fall by champion jockey A.P. McCoy for you readers to win, thanks to the lovely men and women at Orion Books.
In this first novel by the racing legend, a young hotshot jockey, packed to the hilt with his own demons and issues tries to claw his way to the top of the racing game while trying to seek revenge on the people responsible for his father’s downfall. Yoinks! Now there’s an intriguing prospect.
But before you all dash to Amazon and download it to your Kindle Fire using the one-step checkout process, here’s a chance to get it completely free and with no strong attached at all. Honestly. Nothing. Despite the… No, not even that. I’ve just checked.
To win a hardback copy of this galloping tome, head over to our Facebook page…..