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Romantic Break for Three

Have we lost our minds? It’s B&B for Three! Yes, you and you and even you at a romantic hotel.
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Now sold out
  • Redeem your voucher for a one night stay for three people
  • The perfect destination for a romantic evening for 3!

Alas, this is out of stock for now, but we still offer a range of romantic breaks and hotel breaks for sale.

Don’t tell the neighbours – unless the neighbours are particularly broad minded. In which case we suggest you move. We’re offering a sizzling weekend away for three people! Together!

That’s right, with this unique offer we'll send you and two others of your liking to this wonderful, romantic hotel. ‘So what’, we hear you say in your delightful cadence, ‘me and two mates went to Magaluf once, no biggie’.

Au contraire. What we are saying is your fine self and two other companions would be sharing one room. The three of you. At once.

Do I have to draw you a diagram? I think you know where we are coming from. This is possibly the first time in the British Isles that this kind of behaviour has been actively encouraged.

We know this sort of thing happens constantly on the continent. And so in a show of solidarity with our smutty European neighbours, we thought we’d give it a bit of a go.

You’ll be breaking all sorts of taboos in style. You’ll receive champagne and chocolates on arrival at your room, which will be beautifully decorated with rose petals and fairy lights.

Rise the following morning to a delicious breakfast. It's served in your suite, so you won’t have the satisfaction of striding proudly into the breakfast nook, arm in arm with your two companions, cocking a snook at conventional morality.

If you haven’t hurled your laptop across the room in blind fury, this may be the perfect package for you. And you. And also *gasp* you!

If you are the sort to subscribe to certain special interest, subscription only websites, then enjoy this thoroughly non-British, borderline illegal five star luxury experience.

What happens on the day?

This voucher is an easy and flexible way for you and your flexible partners to enjoy this decadent hotel break.

Upon arrival a snickering hotel employee will show you to your luxurious super king (very roomy) double bedroom, which will be beautifully decorated with fairy lights and rose petals – a great way to set the mood for your stay.

You will also receive a bottle of champagne, which may break the tension slightly. Plus a full breakfast in the morning served in your suite, so you don’t have to slink down to the breakfast room all shamefaced.

Please note: this experience is available Sunday-Thursday only, and is strictly for adults only (18+).


Is this for real?

Most definitely, my most broad minded of friend(s).

Will we be given privacy at the hotel?

Almost certainly. Instances of hotel staff bursting into rooms with large old fashioned cameras featuring enormous flashbulbs and taking explicit photos while shouting 'what a scoop!' have almost entirely been stamped out.

Can provide the 3rd person?

Alas, no. We apologise, but our pimping department is currently away on a team bonding exercise in the Gabon.

What combinations of human people are allowed?

Any you wish. We won't judge. Three blokes. Three birds. A bird plus a bloke and a bird. All and any and all are acceptable.

Does this include breakfast?

Indeed! A delicious breakfast for three, no less.

Is there anything I can take for guilt?

Yes, alcohol. You'll receive a bottle of champagne on arrival, as well as a knowing wink.

Isn't this illegal...?

Only in certain parts of Wiltshire, and I can promise that you aren't missing much by avoiding those parts of Wiltshire.

What if I realise I've made a horrible mistake?

Why not blog about it? They're very popular with the young people these days. 'Blog this' and 'blog that' with their trousers hanging halfway off their arses and that dreadful music they listen to.

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Customer Reviews

5 out of 5


The funniest thing iv read in ages. If only I were brave enough.

Review by Yvette

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Review summary for Romantic Break for Three

Average score of 5 out of 5 Total review votes: 1 Total number of reviews: 1
Terms & Conditions

Your voucher is valid for 10 months for three people.

This experience includes one night’s accommodation in a super king double bedroom with chocolates and champagne on arrival as well as a full breakfast in the morning served in your suite.

Your room will be decorated with rose petals and fairy lights.

Please note: this experience is available Sunday-Thursday only, and is strictly for adults only (18+).